from The Dancing Clock, by Nancy Gerber

And so, who am I?

If I discard the roles that have defined me—daughter, wife, mother, friend—and try to name who I am apart from those roles, I would say this: I am a seeker, a collector, and a grazer.

I am a seeker of questions rather than answers, of meaning and meaningful experiences, of what it is that makes human beings tick, the beating heart that keeps us going day after day in the face of troubles, illnesses, uncertainties, disappointments, personal and professional challenges. Yes, it’s a desire to cling to life, to navigate the rushing waters that threaten to capsize us, but it’s also more complicated than that. What drives people to make the choices they make? How do human beings cope with suffering and trauma?

I am a collector of words and all things related to words: novels, stories, poems, journals, diaries. Reading and writing are the modes I use to approach the questions about meaning, motivation, and survival that trouble and animate me.

I am a grazer. I like quiet and solitude so that I can contemplate my questions, so that I have ample time to read and write. I’ve lived through sixteen years of parental illness—first my father’s, then my mother’s—years that were difficult and sad and isolating and emotionally draining. I like to be still, to gaze inward and travel in the realms of imagination and desire, to gather my energy to meet the ever-present demands of living.

—Nancy Gerber, The Dancing Clock